I miss you.....

"When I cry I see you in my tears.....

But I clean my tears.....
so that no one can see you....."

I read these words somewhere..... and could not help crying..... tears started rolling down my cheek as I left this world and travelled into a world of thoughts..... of sorrows..... of bliss..... of misery..... of happiness.....

Its only too much of love that causes you such feeling..... your afraid of someone seeing your tears..... your afraid someone will see your love..... your afraid someone might take away even the tears from you..... your afraid you will have to loose the only rememberances that you are left with..... your afraid inspite of being right next to that person you feel alone..... yet your afraid to cry..... yet your afraid you will loose the only chance of atleast seeing him/her..... your afraid you will be the cause for her misery..... and you stand all alone in the middle of a crowd..... afraid to cry yet unable to hold your tears..... you become frightened..... more frightened than a kid who lost his way..... you dont know what to do..... you dont know where to run..... or from whom to run.....

And all this happen when love crosses all its limits..... when it becomes eternal..... when it becomes divine..... and when you find someone everywhere around you..... in everything around you..... when you can feel that person's existence in your very breath..... yet..... when the person is right beside you you dont feel his/her physical existence..... yet when somebody's absence is much better than there presence..... yet when you prefer to be alone with him/her in your thoughts rather than feeling alone with him/her right beside you.....

Then.....
then you become frightened to cry..... and even if the tears roll down..... you become frightened to let others see them..... you, inspite of knowing that sharing sorrow will reduce it to half, will become afraid to share it to anyone..... will become frightened that you will loose the rememberences that you are left with.....

all alone you feel the company..... but in the company you feel the loneliness.......

being able to love others is happiness...... but being able to be loved by others is bliss.... all are not lucky enough......